Well Honeychild, take your boat and your fishing pole where there's water!! It ain't gonna come to you!

 

dude, you're just a fucking crybaby, I wash my hands of you...

 

Um... duh?

I promise you I only look good from a LARGE distance.

Now I just KNOW you guys are going to read all kinds of crap into this, but you asked: When I was 15 I signed an oath in blood to never touch my hair with anything that cuts until I've had my first kiss. You should see it now, that picture is TWO YEARS old.

WTF? My car doesn't have any dents. I take damn good care of it; it even still smells new.

That and the pimples; but that doesn't matter. I said this before but the point was that girls all react to me as though I am 300 lbs. and have sagging man-tits

Fine great! I never wanted pity! As I've also said before, I can get plenty of that on Myspace if I wanted it.

 

Sticking with the metaphor, this entire thread is about me asking how to find the water!

 

send A recent clear picture. how hard is it to understand. im writing in red ink so you can read this better. send a fuck damn picture of your self.

 

The water is where the fish are...I don't know the statistics, but my guess is that half the population is female and we're everywhere...surely there must be a mall where you live. Saturdays are perfect.

 

That is quaint. I didn't think you meant I would like kicking balls!!

 

You've got to put out some positive energy...such as smiling and holding yourself tall and not give off a dejected appearance like Eeyore...who always has a dark cloud hanging over his head and saying "Oh bother." And personally, I hate the color black...I don't even want people coming to my funeral wearing black.

While you may think that what my friend said was sexist, he IS a man and knows how to be one.

 

And please forgive me Winnie The Pooh and friends for mentioning you on a porn site!

 

its ok alone is a bitch hes understands.

 

aight no offense but if you signed a blood oath for anything, that weirdness might have something to do with why you can't get girls

 

dude go to a fucking emmure. canibal corpse, or tony danza tapdance extravaganze conert meet girls that are bloody oath long haired. just plain weird ppl. maybe thats what you need.

 

me? na sorry I'm really not into that shit. I'm all for freaky girls but not ones like that

 

not you asshole. AIC. ya dick

 

them's fightin words ya bloody bastard

 

I don't mean to sound harsh but what kind of response did you expect, exactly?? Really, what do you expect people to say to you on an online forum??

Don't listen to the shit about how you look. I personally think long hair is sexy and there's nothing wrong with wearing black. The only case this doesn't apply, is if you're trying to pull the high school prom queen type.
The important thing is to make an effort- wash your hair, iron your clothes, smell nice, look presentable- basic of basics.

Basically, as was said before, you have to actually talk to girls. All you have to do is go over and say "can I buy you a drink?" or "how are you this evening?"
Sure, you'll get knocked back sometimes, and that's hard, but everyone who has a partner has been through it. You just dust yourself off and have another drink. Most girls will be nice about it. Those who aren't weren't worth knowing anyway.
Once you've broken the ice, just ask lots of questions. It takes the emphasis off you, especially if you're nervous, and everyone loves to talk about themselves. It makes it very easy.

Thing is, YOU have to be proactive. Occasionally the fairy tale works out and someone falls in your lap, but this is NOT the norm. Get out there and MEET PEOPLE!

 

I think we need to complie a list of places where he could conceivably run into the opposite sex.

1. Outside the mall. People will/may be waiting for friends, lifts, that sorta thing. Find someone sitting on a bench. Ask if there's anyone sitting with them - if they say no, sit down and chat about the weather.

2. Bar. At the bar, there's a girl ordering next to you. Ask her how she is. Talk like you do this all the time; that you find it usual and friendly to chat to strangers in a bar - most people do, in fact!

3. Scenic places. Again, the bench trick.

4. Any queue you find yourself in, with a girl in front or behind you. Just strike up a conversation. Contrary to what you believe, most people are actually quite friendly. Women are not monsters, they enjoy random friendliness from males.

5. Girls behind the counter at shops you frequent.

6. Check out anything that draws people - be it carnivals, markets, record fairs, shows, any sort of impropmtu or unusual sort of thing. Go there. Use all or any of the above tricks.

Finally - this is NOT to allow you to find your dream girl. It won't happen this way - or at least, it's not likely. But this will allow you to become more confident at engaging girls in impromptu conversations.

It's not hard, actually. There's a smoking ban operating in pubs over here, and when I used to smoke I'd nip out for a smoke, and chat to whoever was there, tall, short, fat, thin, male, female, young, old. Almost always, they're willing to talk. The more you practice, the easier it is to charm.

Talk about anything. The weather - banal, but it starts the ball off. Comment on their appearance - got nice hair? Say so. But, y'know, in a round about way, like this: It's windy, you're sitting on a bench with some girl you've just sat next to. You're eating a sandwich, and it's trying to blow away. Half turning to the girl, you say "Man, it sure is windy! It's a nightmare with this sandwich!" At which point, she'll probably laugh, smile, or make some sortof non-confrontational comment. So next, you say something like 'must be a nightmare - ruining your hair! It's looking really good nonetheless, though!'

That sorta thing. I'm doing my best here mate. You gotta get out there and try stuff. This is all just... practice, and enjoying the company of females. Which is fantastic.

Anyone else got any ideas for meeting places?

 

Great advice, but in CA you have to be 21 to be able to get into a bar....

 

not necessarly. go in with a bunch of ppl have one guy order for all of you. then after about an hr into the bar they'll be used to you drinking. and you can order without them checking for id.

 

Ok. AIC...take note. It wasn't like that when I lived in CA...